"He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall, but those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint. Isa. 40:29-31
Psa 103:1 A Psalm of David. Bless Jehovah, O my soul; And all that is within me, bless his holy namePsa 103:2 Bless Jehovah, O my soul, And forget not all his benefits: Psa 103:3 Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; Who healeth all thy diseases; Psa 103:4 Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; Who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies; Psa 103:5 Who satisfieth thy desire with good things, So that thy youth is renewed like the eagle.
"Our good Lord bestows really good things, not vain toys and idle pleasures; and these he is always giving, so that from moment to moment he is satisfying our soul with good: shall we not be still praising him? If we never cease to bless him till he ceases to bless us, our employment will be eternal. “So that thy youth is renewed like the eagle's.” Renewal of strength, amounting to a grant of a new lease of life, was granted to the Psalmist; he was so restored to his former self that he grew young again, and looked as vigorous as an eagle, whose eye can gaze upon the sun, and whose wing can mount above the storm. Our version refers to the annual moulting of the eagle, after which it looks fresh and young; but the original does not appear to allude to any such fact of natural history, but simply to describe the diseased one as so healed and strengthened, that he became as full of energy as the bird which is strongest of the feathered race, most fearless, most majestic, and most soaring." -- Spurgeon, Treasury of Psalms
As a teenager, after a classmate was killed in an accident, I suddenly found myself with questions about life I couldn't answer. A fear of death and the unknown haunted me. Who is God? Is He real? What does He have to do with me? If there is a hell, will I go there?
I didn't know where to find the answers except to ask God Himself, and to look in His Word, the Bible, and read it. But what I found out was that,sure enough, I was heading for hell! What could I do? Was there a way out? What kind of a God was God anyway? Will He accept me as His child? Can I start over?
At 17 yrs. old, I found the answer. Jesus said, "God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that WHOSOEVER believeth on Him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16. Wow! How incredible! He could forgive me and accept me into His Heaven!
So my journey with the Lord began. For the last 34 yrs. God has been showing me how to walk on water. He gave me His Spirit to live inside of my heart. His presence became more apparent to me as time went on. But I had to learn to trust Him through life's trials, to trust Him as faithful when it didn't seem like it inwardly.
After my second son, Jesse was born, and it became apparent to me that everything was not just right with Him, I went into a deep depression. He cried all the time. That soon turned into screaming at everything that touched him or frustrated him. He had uncontrollable rages as he got older. He couldn't communicate well, so he couldn't tell me what bothered him, what hurt, how he felt inside. As a mother, this was the hardest thing for me to deal with. Others misunderstood and gave advice that only hurt. But Jesus taught me to seek His face, to trust in and cling to His Word, and to wait on Him, and to not look at my circumstances. Like Peter, who had to keep his eyes on Jesus to walk on the water, but when he saw the wind and waves, he sank. I needed to not look at what people around me thought, or inside at myself and my own weakness, but at Jesus. I needed to come to Him for strength inside.
I made a tape of scripture and listened to it all day and when I went to bed at night. Soon I was delivered from fear and depression and had the strength of the Lord in my inner being.
Eventually, when Jesse turned 11, and got more out of control, we found that he had Tourette's Syndrome, developmental delays, obsessive/compulsive disorder, uncontrollable aggression, (which we learned later on was caused by the medication he was put on), and a very low frustration level with hypersensitivity. Our home became an unbearable place for all of us to live.
There is so much to this story I could share with you. Our family went through a time of Crisis and deep stress. There were things happening that I could not see my way through. I saw Jesse suffer through so much, and the rest of my family also not understanding and not knowing how to deal with it. I lost my health and became bedridden much of the time. Though we had God's promises for Jesse, and for ourselves in His Word, we saw nothing but hopelessness for all of us. But each time I cried out to my Abba Father, He never failed me. There was times I was at the end of myself, but that was so that Jesus could show Himself to me. I learned to "wait upon the Lord", and He became my strength. He raised me up once again, on eagle's wings and renewed my strength.
Since that time God has worked many wonderful things in our family. Jesse has found the Lord and I see God's love growing in him continually. Another prodigal, my oldest son,also found the Lord and I see God's grace moving in their lives in wonderful ways. We are not through with our trials. We are still learning to trust Jesus and walk on water.
I hope to share with you along the way, all the things that the Lord has used in my life to comfort and strengthen me, hopefully to strengthen and comfort others in the Lord. This website is my journey with the Lord, and the lessons of the cross I wish to share with others, that He has given me.
We all have to learn to walk on water in this life and not let our circumstances drown us. Jesus is the way.